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Do you remember how many effin' cranes that was??
A lot.
One thousand is a big number. When I started out, sure, I wanted to be what Emily Hope recently called "blogfamous." I wanted to have thousands of readers. I thought that would make me a giant success. As I slowly grew, it started to hit me that it might actually be possible.
I thought having 1,000 readers would make me feel different... like maybe it would finally prove that I was legit or something. I know it's a big milestone, but even though I've received many congratulations, I'm not sure why.
I thought I would be doing better things with the blog at this point. I'm a little disappointed in myself, if you can believe that... I guess what I'm saying is I'm bummed that, in my opinion, the quantity doesn't match the quality.
Let me try to explain...
Reviewing my recent posts there are more sponsored posts, more giveaways, and more link ups. Not to say those are bad, but where are my design services I've been talking about for so long? Where is my new layout I've been needing to code? Where are my projects I should be working on? Where did me go?
I feel like I'm at that breaking point where I need to choose between engaging with my readers and focusing on my life and career. I need to choose whether I want to spend my days promoting or actually spend time accomplishing what I set out to do from the beginning- becoming one helluva designer.
I've been struggling with this a lot lately. I've been so busy with cleaning out my inbox, returning comments, trying to comment back... that I'm not reaching goals. I see people producing amazing creative things, things I should be doing, and here I am sitting on my ass because I have 50 emails I should have already answered. I get so exhausted and by the time I'm ready to do my own post my creative energy is fried.
I hate to say it, but maybe I've become a blog snob. I'm not saying I have 1,000 people banging down my door wanting to be besties, but I've felt a lot of guilt lately for not returning every comment. I've seen some posts around complaining about bloggers that don't return comments, and I have to say that I understand why.
I've decided I'm not going to pressure myself to do that anymore. There are several times when yes, I will want to spend a good 3 or 4 (or 8) hours reading blogs, because I love it and that is the reason why we blog in the first place, to engage with the community. But when I do that I want it to be authentic, I want to want to do it, not feel obligated or expected.
What a way to show my gratitude, right?
I feel like an asshole (yep- uncensored) but I had to confess. Maybe a confession at 1:30 in the morning isn't the best time to explain clearly what I'm about to publish, and I'm sorry if this wasn't the kind of post you were expecting for a milestone, but hey, at least it's real.
Just know that I love you guys... and I'm not just saying that. I read every comment. I read every email. I appreciate you. I thank you always for your kind words of encouragement. If this blog was a machine you would be the fuel. I recognize that. I will never forget that. And I won't ever forget where I started.
It's time I start living. It's time I start embracing my potential. It's time I stop finding reasons to procrastinate. It's time I start living up to my own expectations.
I just hope you are willing to stick along for the ride.
You know what, I love this post.. it's one of the best ones I've read in a long time because it's so real and relatable. I struggle to answer comments and stuff sometimes so I know the guilt you're talkign about, but you DO have a great blog here so you should be proud of yourself either way :)
ReplyDeleteI don't know about anyone else but I personally really enjoy the posts that just show a little bit of you and what your'e up to, the ones that don't have to take hours but really reflect you as a person.. and I'd really like to see the designs you work on if you're willing to share?
xxx
You are so real, Kristen, and I really appreciate that. For almost all of us, blogging is a HOBBY. Yes, it might bring in a couple hundred a month if you've got a sponsor program, but that's a pittance compared to an actual salary. So you should feel guilty if you prioritize blogging over your career, NOT the other way around. It's okay to put something first, and something else second.
ReplyDeleteI usually find that when I don't have enough time and am feeling guilty, it's because I'm putting the wrong things first. When I put the right things first, everything else still seems to fit in.
Just stay focused, girl. You are definitely going to be one helluva designer :)
Homegirl, I'm with you. All the way. If everyone is in this blogging thing for the right reasons, they are here because they enjoy the content you put out, the services you provide, the voice you offer. They aren't here in hopes that you'll follow back, or respond, or become their best friends. I mean, maybe they are, but that shouldn't ever be anyone's initial motive in reading blogs/blogging. It's not mine. I click onto certain blog posts because they catch my eye on my blog feed, or there's a good catch line in someone's tweet, or because that person has become a close friend and I enjoy keeping up with their life. And then I read it for the pure pleasure. If I feel inspired to, I leave a comment. And tho, I hope that they'll respond, I don't expect it.
ReplyDeleteObviously, I'm kind of in the same boat as you as we have already discussed, in trying not to let go of the engaging and showing our readers that we love and appreciate them back, but I've decided that you just gatta focus on the content, your goals, and most of all your OWN LIFE outside of social media. I think if we put our energy into those things first, then that's what is going to keep people comin' and I think everyone will respect that! I mean, I hope they will.
Blogging is not about drowning in your inbox, it's about frolicking in your content, your writing, your business, and your life that inspires all those things. I fear too many bloggers are losing sight of that...
Just do your thing, pretty girl. I'm definitely sticking around for the ride :) (I'm anxious for this new blog design of yours.... I know it's gunna be so good!!)
You had me at paper cranes. 1000 is a hell of a lot of paper cranes. Also, why is that I used to know how to make paper cranes and now I have no recollection? It's scary how much we lose with time passing.
ReplyDeleteWhich is why you definitely shouldn't waste time with guilt when it comes to blogging!
Some of my favourite blogs don't ever answer comments as far as I know - A Beautiful Mess for example. They are a busy business, a busy blog and I wouldn't expect them to.
ReplyDeleteI comment on people's blogs regularly - I am able to make the time to do so. If I couldn't then I wouldn't worry over it.
It's nice to get a reply from time to time. A lot of comments don't really need a reply. I certainly don't sit around expecting a reply at all.
You do what's right for you. It strikes me that with over 1000 readers you now more than ever need time to focus on content rather than on answering comments.
Turn off comment moderation and revert to capthcha if you need to.
I think you are saying and are about to do exactly the right thing here. Go ahead and give yourself permission to do it.
And don't even think about replying to this comment!!
Sarah
http://acatlikecuriosity.blogspot.co.uk/
I am glad you posted about this. And I always respect your view on blogotics. I think this is a good start for your relaunch. This is just the next phase for you. I wouldn't worry about too many sponsor posts, giveaways, etc. because they supported you to get you where you are now. And now you are ready to take on the challenge with stride. You'll see that your readers will stick around. I am confident in that.
ReplyDeleteUmmm...and tell me this .... people didn't think I was serious when I said I wanted to be 'blogfamous'? Did they? Ummm....actually I want to just get to a point when things are good and then have a crazy meltdown like Britney Spears or ever better Charlie Sheen. Some of his meltdown vlogs are AMAZING!
Kristen - Use your relaunch to not only to change your look - but as an opportunity to rebrand. Don't worry about the past when your future is so bright.
You're going to do great. Be great.
There are some blogs I would read no matter what- and yours is one of them! Thank you for all the support & encouragement that you've given to Me along the way. I can't wait to see what is next for you, and hope that we get to meet for real one day! xoxo
ReplyDeleteFirst of all CONGRATS ON 1,000! :)
ReplyDeleteThat's a big deal.
And second, I can totally 100% relate to how you're feeling. I deal with guilt of not answering every comment or visiting every single one of my readers' blogs.
Reading this post made me realize that it's not because I'm being an "upity" blogger, it's because I want to spend time on producing GOOD content.
So thank you for the reminder and for pulling me out of my guilt ;)
xo
Congrats on the 1000 followers! You for sure deserve it!
ReplyDeleteAlso, its alright to take a step back and rexamine what you're doing. If you're not happy, your work, your life, and your blog will reflect that. I think if you spend more time developing content, or doing *gasp* actual paid work (not that blogging isn't.. you get what I mean!) but what I'm trying to say is that we will still be here. :) Even if everyone doesn't stick around, I for one would rather have 500 faithful followers than 1000 shaky ones. :)
Congrats again!
Congrats on 1000! Love this post!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure I could have written this Kristen. Thank you so much for your honesty, and please know that there are so many of us who understand and who can actually relate. It's really easy to complain about people not responding to your comments when you don't receive a ton of them, but your blog is a way to share your life. You need to live your life if you want to blog about it! So, please don't feel like you need to answer any of our comments. I think Jenni from Story of my Life wrote a really great post about this once, about how a post is a letter to your readers and that the comments are their letters back. Or, I think that was the gist of it :) Anyway, long comment here, but please know that we understand. I do, at least. Because I struggle with the exact same thing, and it's hard.
ReplyDeleteBut congratulations on hitting 1,000 my dear! That's quite an accomplishment.
xoxo,
Joelle
Hi Kristen! I am a new reader of your blog and recently just re-launched my blog. I totally hear you on feeling obligated to answer every comment! I just wrote a post similar to this about how I want to blog for fun, as a stress reliever and for enjoyment. I don't want it to feel like a job -- I already have one of those. :) I love your blog and I will keep coming back even if you don't respond to every comment. Have an awesome weekend!
ReplyDeleteMaybe I am snotty but I don't worry too much about responding to every comment?
ReplyDeleteI guess I figure my posts are the way I engage with my readers.
I really hope that's not a bad attitude.
But I still have itty bitty blog, so at this point it's really not a huge problem. :)
I loved this post, because even though my blog isn't huge, I've struggled with some of the same issues. Do I write for pageviews or stay true to myself and my writing and my values?
I've tried my best to stay true and turned down a free product or sponsored post here and there.
It's such a hard balance.
Thanks for being so honest.
I think your blog is a pretty special place. And I think you do deserve congratulations! So, congratulations. :)
Hey girl, haha not gonna lie, was hoping for a response to my e-mail about what the HECK to wear in Utah, esp since I think I'll be in your hometown in 3 days! But honestly, don't worry about the emails you don't get to (even mine!). I mean I only get maybe 14 comments on my posts daily and I've started e-mail replying and it's become a 1 hour-2 hour deal! I can't imagine with having 1,000 followers. So I think in time, the people who want you to respond to every comment will realize that when a blog grows, it's hard to keep up with stuff like that (at least I'm definitely understanding now). And at the end of the day, your blog should be what you want it to be, so just do you! I'll stick around :)
ReplyDeleteEvani
simplyevani@gmail.com
Kristen, my sweet Kristen.
ReplyDeleteThis post is so real and to the point, which is one of the reasons I and 999 other ppl have flocked to your blog. Shoot, ever since I started my internship I've realized I have had only a handful of blog posts, I've neglected engaging in the community and my blogging goals have taken a backseat. LIFE HAPPENS! I think though this is the perfect opportunity though for you to regroup and focus on your relaunch..esp with that fancy diploma coming your way ;)
Just remember that blogging is #1 about making you happy, inspiring yourself in the creative world and at the end of the day, a hobby. And don't be too hard on yourself!! All of the hardwork that you put into your blog, your design services and your sponsorship program shine through! Love ya girl, and congrats on the milestone. you've been one of my dearest blogger inspirations that one day I hope to aspire towards <3
Congratulations dear on your 1000 readers. You definitely deserve it and you have been an inspiration to others, including myself. It's hard to be the perfect anything, not to mention the perfect blogger, but you make it look effortless even if you don't think so yourself. Of course you wanna be more in touch with yourself and you know what? Go for it. But you got to 1000 readers for a reason and you should be proud of that.
ReplyDeleteOh, giiiiiiiiiiirl. I LOVE this post. Amanda (of Royal Daughter Designs) and I were JUST having a conversation about all of this. I feel ya!
ReplyDeletei admire the truth and openness of this post. as your blog grows, there's no way you can reply to every single comment. esp having 1000+ readers (congrats btw). as a new blogger, of course i desire to become blogfamous (i guess, who doesn't) but then i always remember that blogging, for me at least, is a hobby. not my full-time job. which makes me realized, i need to blog more about things i matters to me the most, not just for comments purposes. but once in a while link-ups and giveaways and sponsor post is alright.
ReplyDeleteif your readers are true fans of yours, they'll stick around :)
rima
first of all, congratulations on 1,000! you go girl! and you know what? i hear ya about being fried from emails, comments, etc. i decided to stop re: to every single comment because it was making my quality of blogging decrease and also my love of blogging. without quality posts, there will be no comments. people love you for you and your posts and your voice. not because you respond to everything. thanks for the honesty!
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain girly. I feel so guilty if I can't answer each and every e-mail. You can't let your real life be pushed to the backburner for blogging though I've learned.
ReplyDeletexo Shane
I am not even a elite blogger nor has millizionns of followers but i just find it very important for me to write and respond ONLY when i feel like it.
ReplyDeleteannnnd the main reason this post got my attention?
i dont know how to fold my cranes yet i have 3 of em tattooed on me...hmmmmmmm.
http://lucyndiamonds.blogspot.com/2012/05/tattooing.html
and now I don't expect you to respond to this :)
Loving the honesty. My blog is not nearly as popular and it can feel overwhelming even then. So I understand. I can't wait to read more from this blog, I just found it!
ReplyDeletexoxo, hm
Kristen, I always love your honesty. It's hard to find balance with so much going on in life. Just do the best you can, and always make time for fun! Everything about blogging should be fun! I absolutely hate when bloggers post..just to post. I can tell it's forced, it's a waste of my time reading it and I've even unfollowed some blogs because it doesn't seem very genuine.. Why blog if it's not you, or not something you love to do?
ReplyDeleteThanks for always keepin' it real :)
xo Kayla
hey there! newest follower to your amazing blog... i can totally relate to this post. absolutely love your honesty! cant wait to read more from ya :)
ReplyDeletexox
ellen
thishive.blogspot.com
I just have to tell you that congrats on the milestone and giiiirl I will be on this ride till the end. You are too amazing.
ReplyDeleteTrue story.
xx
Liz
Hi Kristen! I'm a new follower and I've been reading back through your posts. I've been blogging for almost seven years now across multiple platforms and I know exactly what you mean! When your blog starts to feel like it isn't authentic anymore, you're just kind of like, "Wait, what happened here?" At least that's how I've felt. Good for you for being honest with yourself and your readers. I look forward to future posts! And any new designs you plan to share.
ReplyDeleteAshley
www.welovedhere.com
Kristen, thanks for being honest and I hope you find the healthy balance you are longing for, I am confident you will! It's so good to be aware--now you can move forward trying to re-organize and get a handle on what's most important;)
ReplyDeletexo
On a not so deep and meaningful side - we totally read Saduko and a Thousand Cranes....and we totally learned how to make origami cranes....and I totally still know how to make them to this day because of that!! *cool kid*
ReplyDeleteI love making paper cranes. I sent some to Japan
ReplyDeleteEmma
http://emmavogelsang.blogspot.com